Why I do..

I am having one of those days, or nights, again. I can't accept the fact that I miss Paul despite of all the hurtful things that he did to me. I really miss him a lot. I want to call. I wan to send a text message. I want to hear him explain why he did that to me. I really do not know what I've done or did not do to deserve this kind of treatment. I thought I was a fairly nice person... I was doing alright until today. I broke-down just moments ago. I cried silently and wiped my tears as quickly as they came out. I am so sorry. I feel so pathetic now. Why... you're not worth it anyway. This kills me. ... and because it does. I die each and every single day just thinking about this whole dilemma.

I am so hurt. Paul, why? Tell me why... at least that you owe me.

-Andrea-

Sushi for LOVE!

Hello, hello! October is going by really fast. We are entering the second week, and so far every thing is well. I passed my calculus exam with an A+. Good for me! All my other classes are going great, too. I am enjoying this busy mode and now that I have a second job, every thing will be even more busier. Today was a happy day even though it was raining hard in Chicago. I had sushi and bubble tea with my friends. It was so fun! I really like being around the same people everyday. We are gonna make this lunch congregation a regular Friday thing. I like this idea so much! I am excited! =)

I really cannot think of what to say right now. But I do have a lot to say. I will update later.

-Andrea-

Hello October!

Midterm exams are almost over with only two of them left: chemistry and humanities. I am not so worried about those two because I believe that I will do well. There is no reason for me to fail them because I have prepared for more than a week and ever since school started. Calculus exam was not so bad at all. I thought I would see some weird problems with trigonometric functions and pi's. Haha! There was not a single one of them in the exam. I even memorized the unit circle which could come in handy during the latter part of this course, and so it was not a waste. I am happy that I am starting to like calculus like how much I like chemistry. Surprisingly, I also like my other classes. The only one that bores me out of my wits is my humanities class. My professor is nice but then what will I learn from him just being nice? He talks the whole time about things that enters my right ear and leaves from the left. Anyway, I think I can get by with it. What's fun is that I got a second job to add to my juggling act. I am working everyday now with school and gym, too. I want to be busy and never idle like this because with rest and idle moments, there comes boredom. In addition, with boredom comes deep thinking of the past. I do not want to think of the past so much. I want my heart back. I want it whole. I am strong and I am getting there soon. Recovery was faster than I predicted. I am enjoying my life so much right now, but I am also being very cautious. I stick with the people with the same interest as me. As I have mentioned, or not, Burnham Hall (the Honors College building) is my second home. Right after I work out, I go there and chill by reading and doing homework. I hang out with my friends over there. During my breaks I stay there as well. It is very homy to me. I like it and the people that stay there. It is really fun! After school, I go straight to work. By the way, the second job is retail too. I work at Bath and Body Works now. Oh it smells so good at that place. I am so happy to be offered a position there. It is a complete change from smelling the aroma of coffee. The scent at the Bath and Body Works store relaxes me so much. It soothes my tired senses from overworking myself at the gym and school. So many things to do now.

I cannot wait for the holidays and go back to Canada for Boxing Day and New Year. I would love to see my family and friends again.

Work at 3pm till 8pm. Then readings must be continued. =)

-Andrea-

Carla Bruni-Sarkozy

So lately I have been listening to Carla Bruni-Sarkozy's songs. She was a model, but now she is one of the most powerful women in the world (because of her husband). She is married to the president of France, Nicolas Sarkozy. I love her voice! It is so soothing even though I do not understand a single word in french. It helps me when I am studying. Speaking of that, I should not be here! I should be making my flash-cards for chemistry and calculus! Haha! Oh well... life is going great. I am happy with what is happening right now. I met so many friends at the university and I hang-out with them almost everyday at the lounge. We basically find it fun to just study and be serious with it. All of us, mostly, have the same interests. We want to be physicians, engineers, attorneys, and nurses. We are cool with each other. I met this one girl named Mahdis. She is very nice and we are becoming great friends. We introduced new songs to each other. I owe her for introducing me to Carla Bruni- Sarkozy's songs! She is so fun to talk to! I also met Sehyun, Saif, and Amoya. They are one of the coolest group of people at BH lounge! So happy to have met them. =)

Anyway.... I have to go back to studying now. I am gonna go change my routines and start with a better one tomorrow. I will be up at 4:30 am sipping on my protein shake then off to the gym till 8am. So 5am to 8am is a good workout time. First half is cardio, then second half is weights. Oooooooh! Sexy body on the way! =P

I miss my mommy! She went to Denver for the weekend for a convention. She will be back later tonight. Yey!

BTW.... LET's GO CHICAGO BEARS!!!! BEAT SEATTLE!!! ON TO SUPER BOWL!!! CHYEAAH!

-Andrea-

I really feel enlightened!

As if my whole life is laid in front of me right now and it is situated at the palm of my hands. I just got home about 3 hours ago from the APAMSA meeting/panel with medical school student. Suddenly, a lot of things came rushing in my head. It felt like outlines of things I have to accomplish in order to get into a really good and respectable med school. I have so many ideas right now. My ideas are overflowing and flooding my brain now. I can write them down and it will look like an autobiography in the making. I am so glad that I joined the APAMSA because in that group I will meet people with the same interests and maybe some day will be someone I would end up working with at the hospital. Physicians, or future physicians rather, coming together like this is just so awesome! I get to have an older sibling, too! That sibling will provide me information that will answer my med school questions. During the panel, they talked about what would look nice on a medical school application. They said that extracurricular activities will help a lot just as much as academics. There should be something shining in your application because there will be many others that will have the same high GPA and school ranking, or that they would have a higher MCAT scores. Personal statements are the ones that will break even the application process according to the panel. But before all of this things, we really should think about if this is what we want to do because it will seriously take a big chunk of our life away. I have many things that I am ready to sacrifice in order to become a surgeon, but like what this other med student said, those things will change once I actually become a medical student. Time will come when I wont be able to give those things up. They have also mentioned to do something other than the sciences as a major. You have to have a bit of fun, too. When I realized what they were saying, it just popped in my head what would my second major be. I thought of pursuing Japanese as my second major because it is a language where I think I wont get bored with. In addition to that, if I learn Japanese and become fluent at it, there will be a big possibility for me to do an externship in Japan and learn the latest in their medical technology. *thumbs up*

So... aside from school, I think I have some form of life, too!

Today I finally went back to the gym to workout. It has been a week since I last exercised. My body was craving for workout and so I went today. It was so refreshing and I feel so good right now! Anyway, my dearest friend Sergio got me the job at the Neuroscience Lab at UIC and so that means that I will have a second job now. Moreover, the job at the lab will help me with med school applications, too! All I can say is WOW and THANK YOU to him because of this. What is so funny is that I also got a call for an interview from Bath and Body Works asking to work for them. I am still thinking if I should take on a 3rd job or not. I am focused on school but I also need money. I hope my grades do not fluctuate. NO. They wont. I can do this! I am strong-willed, hardworking, dedicated, and passionate. I can do this.

Lastly for today's entry....

Sehyun is nice and really adorable. =)

Goodnight world! I am a happier person now.

-Andrea-

Why am I up at 2am? LMAO.

K. So today I attended the FIA general meeting. It was so fun! I met so many people and for the longest time, I have not seen a bajillion of Filipino's in one room! I cannot wait for the next meeting so I could meet more of them or get to know some of them better. I hung out with the flips today and finally escaped my little cocoon at Burnham Hall (Honors College). I chilled at Montgomery today because I wanna see other people. I am still gonna be at BH most of the time because that place is my second home. Also, today was the induction ceremony for the Society of Future Physicians. It was kind of boring but at least Sef and Sehyun were there to keep me awake. Sef kept on talking like a true intellectual (not that he is not) and Sehyun just sat there pointing at GPPA people. It was like watching a movie for me. I left Whay after the ceremony... I feel bad for doing that. I was confused on who was I with. Her or Sehyun. LOL. So I walked with Sehyun downstairs and separated because he takes Metra and I take the Blue Line. When I got home I laid on my bed and was T.K.O right away. Good thing I got all my homework done. =)

Quiz on Schejbal's class for 9/24.... Better score awaits.

-Andrea-

p.s - Getting there little by little. Friends are helping me big time. I owe you guys! <3

Long time no see my dear green page. =)

Time for an update. Yes?

Today the Chicago Bears won vs. the Steelers! Yeynezz! Thought this will be a losing season for us Chicagoan's, but Jay Cutler picked up his A game and did what a good quarterback should do. I wonder what Rex Grossman is thinking right now. Hmmmm..... Anyway, first month of school is over! How fast did that happen? I survived it and I am so proud of myself. I got accepted at the Society for Future Physicians. I feel so cool right now (cool for nerds by the way. =P ). I also found our that I am eligible for a tuition fee waiver for next semester. I have to take advantage of this so that I would not have to take a second set of loans. Also, I feel like I have adjusted to the university life now. I am not so stressed about commuting back and forth. I am also able to workout better now. I workout twice every Tuesday, Wednesday, and Fridays. First workout is cardio, and second is for weightlifting. I am not trying to be buff. EWWWWW. I just want to tone my muscles and shape up for next summer because my cousin will be getting married! OMG. I need to find a nice dress and look really sexy and beautiful in it. I wish I catch the bouquet, too. I am so excited for her! I hope to go the Bahamas as well next summer and finally soak up under the sun. I have been hiding from Mr. Sunshine for the past year. Yeah, I said the past year! I have not been to the beach either. Maybe it is time to do some MAJOR changes. Life is good and I am blessed with a wonderful family and set of friends that loves me dearly. How thankful I am to God. =)

The blood test results were all negative and so I am safe. I am healthy and I did not inherit my mom's thyroid problem. I will take advantage of this good health and work as much as I can so I will be able to help my mom and dad with the expenses. I cannot believe that this year is coming to an end so soon. It is almost the end of September and that means we have 3 months till the new year. I will be 20 and wiser next year. Winter and snow.... Oh I cannot wait for you to come!

Another thing I cannot wait for is to see my dearest sister Ate Clang in November! I am so happy we are finally seeing each other again. I have lost contact with a lot of people but I am finding them again and seeing them is so exciting. We are going to bond like how we did when we were babies. She is older but not so much. I can't wait!

Shout out to my MOMMA! Mommy dearest..... I love you and thanks for supporting me through it all... you witnessed everything and we have gotten closer in the past couple of months. I can see where you are coming from now. Lesson well learned for me. Advance Happy Birthday to you. I love you Mom! <3

-Andrea-

P.S. Thanks for everything... I learned a lot from you. It was through so much pain that I learned how to value myself more than any other person. I wish you well. Thank you.

Hello new life! I am gonna be starting as Freshman student in college tomorrow. Now I can really call myself a college student. =)

This time I am really gonna push myself to become an excellent student considering my honors status in the university. This is my chance to prove myself worthy of going on to medical school. Everything is new now... new hair color (mahogany brown!)... new clothes and shoes... new stuff... new LIFE!

K. I am going to sleep now so I could workout in the morning and a have fresh start for the day. Hello professors! I hope I make good lasting impression on them. SMILE! =)

-Andrea

It deems to be complicated why on my recent post I stated how I should be content with the life that I have right now. I should have considered that my life, of course, does not only revolve around me, but also around the people I love. Right at this very moment I could say that I am very upset at the circumstances that my relatives in the Philippines are in now. My aunt and my mom just finished talking over Skype and I was there to hear and see my aunt cry her heart out to my mother asking for help. She needs all the help that she could get from us, financially and spiritually. I am mad and really confused at why my uncle wont help my aunt out. Why when she asked for help he immediately turned her down. How could he? He did not do it in a polite or nice way either. I am furious at how people could be so selfish over money. Yes, we do need money and these days, the world revolves WITH money. I could not help but cry at my aunt's pitiful situation and how I cannot help her right now. I will have money soon and I swore to help her because when we were the ones in need and she had the money, she really helped us. She never left my mother hopeless like what my uncle is doing to my aunt. From all 4 siblings, my uncle is the most frugal one and we understand why. But now that my aunt is in most need, how could he not help her? His reasons are very shallow and selfish. I really cannot understand. He claims to be very religious and every Saturday their is a prayer meeting at his house with food for all the guests. With that being considered, why can't he use some of his money to help my aunt with the smallest amount he could give? Every single penny counts now. I wish he could remember one of the stories from the bible that I learned in grammar school: the story of Lazarus. Lazarus said that no matter how rich you are, you can never bring your money with you to the next life and so there is no use keeping them to yourself. As much as you can, do everything to help. I hope he remembers this one day. My eyes hurt from crying. I have not cried as much for a long time but I could not help it. If I had all the money I need, I will help my aunt at the speed of light with no questions asked.

I pray that he wakes from his selfishness. Moreover, I pray that my aunt overcomes this huge challenge. I know she can.

-Andrea-

I have recently read about the book/autobiography by Randy Pausch and somehow, reading it over again breaks my heart into million pieces. For some reason, I am only in my few pages but I kept on stopping and stopping until I just completely stopped and put the book down. It is so gut wrenching that I started to think about how hard life was for him and his family. Thus, before that, I asked myself how he managed to give this last lecture. There are so many reasons why I should be thankful with the life that I have right now, but I still complain. I always say that I wish this would happen, or that I hope I could have done that. Why can't I be just contented with what I have and be happy that I am not sick with only some months to live like him. Technically, this guy has a lot to complain for. He has a wife, 3 very young children, and dreams that cannot be fulfilled anymore. He has already passed away even before I started reading his autobiography, yet, I want to tell him that what he wrote and his courage has given so much inspiration to live my life to the fullest. Truthfully, there is only really one life to live. There are so many things that I want to do and really want to say while I am alive and healthy, but honestly, the first thing I would do is to let all of my loved ones know how much I care for them and how thankful I am that they let me become a part of their life.

"Too many people go through life complaining about their problems. I've always believed that if you took one-tenth the energy you put into complaining and applied it to solving the problem, you'd be surprised by how well things can work out." -Randy Pausch

Even if my heart breaks while reading this, I have to continue. There is exactly 20 days left before school starts. I am excited, yet very scared. In contrast, I am still looking forward to it specially because of my new buddy: Nienke. She is gonna be my buddy for the rest of out college career.

-Andrea-

Well,well.... birthday is over. It was fun overall but I had mixed emotions all thru out the day...

-My friends, Mimi, Vic, and Van brought me to Ignite to rent the Rockband room. It was really cool because right when we went in, Sam followed us. I was shocked because he sang for me. Oh dear... If you just knew how wide my smile was. He gave me a candle-less cake because we can't light up anything inside the room since there was a smoke detector. LOL. Sam hugged me too! How nice and sweet! =) I failed twice from singing and playing the bass, but it made it even more fun! Haha! Oh well, I can come back and play again. Yey! Gonna see Sam again! WOW. =P

-My family and I went to Java and Mug to have some Korean desserts. I had my usual fruit bingsoo! It's soooooo good! Yummehh in my tummmmeh! I told my mom that I was upset in the morning because I told her that I would prefer and choose to have a slice of cake with a candle on it over the money they gave me. See, I am happy when I see cakes with candles. Every candle serves as a wish for me. I could wish from it even if it does not come true. If you guys would just know how much joy a cake with a candle brings to me. I am a kid. I think I did not turn 19, but went back and turned 7 instead. LMAO. They bought me a cake with lots of candles at the end of the day. I was happy.

* I was upset that Paul forgot my birthday. If Ate Ira did not try to remind him that it was my birthday, he would have completely forgotten. It got me sad because I told him I wish he was here to celebrate my birthday with him and he replied that he wishes he could be here just as well. He forgot...

* I was upset that I had to ask for a cake from my parents when I said that that is the only thing I want and nothing more. They bought me a cake.... but I had to nag them about it. How pathetic could I be? I don't care. I prefer cakes more than anything else on my birthdays. I love them because I feel special when given one. You have to understand.. that is how I am.

I have to sleep now. Tomorrow is another day. My birthday is over but the celebrations are not! Looking forward to seeing my little sister Haian and get sushi together. I missed her so much!

Goodnight... thanks for a wonderful birthday. I am not upset anymore. I am sorry for being upset. I guess I am entitled to it once in a while, so give it to me today. I hope next year is better. I cannot wait... well.. there is December to cheer me up. I am going back to Brampton. I will see my friends again! I am excited.

( I met a new person today. he gave me a hug and sang happy birthday for me. His name is Sam. Hi Sam! It was nice meeting you! )

Batman... you forgot.. but it's okay.... I guess it's not so bad to forget things at times. I understand... like always. I miss you. See you soon! <3

-Andrea-

Happy 19th Birthday to me!!! I am thankful that I was given another year to live and enjoy life. I am happy to be alive and in good health. Hopefully, this year will be full of adventures and fulfilling moments both in school, family life, and love. I did not plan to do anything special this year unlike my past birthdays. I am just happy to be alive and excited as well. There are so many things that makes me so thankful and happy. I will enumerate the ones off the top of my head.

1. Like I said, I am thankful to have lived another year because it is another chance given to me to become a better person. I will make the most out of this year and enjoy life as much as I can. School comes first, but I will have fun too!

2. I am thankful that my mother is recovering fast from her surgery last week. I may be a little upset when she nags, but she is a mother and that is what she is suppose to do: to lead me and tell me the things she knows that will benefit me. I love you Mommy!

3. I am thankful that I have father that takes care of his family and would put us first before anything else. My dad is the best father in the world. Seeing him take care of my mother like that and not leaving her side makes me admire him more. Even if he did not pass his certification exam, I know he will do better the next time. Good luck Daddy!

4. I am thankful for having such nice friends that cares for me as much as I do for them. Thanks for always being there for me. Special mention: ATE IRA- Thanks for the status message Happy Birthday greeting! ;)

5. I am thankful that today my Bessy replied to my email and greeted me Happy Birthday. I miss you so much Mei! I hope you continue to do just well. That message made me very happy.

6. I am thankful that my uncle passed the board exam for nursing. Congratulations uncle!

7. Last but not the least. I am thankful for knowing a special person that makes me happy effortlessly. Thanks Paul... for everything, =) Although you forgot that it was my birthday. It's alright as long as you don't forget it next year.

I ended up having 7 reasons to be thankful! Wow! Lucky 7, eh?

-Andrea-

Yesterday was family day! It was not as fun as I expected it to be, but I was with my family which I rarely see come together like yesterday so it's all good. We had so much food that I thought I was gonna go in a state of coma! Just by looking at it you will feel really full. By mid noon I got a little bored waiting for my baby cousin to come so I went upstairs and thought of taking a nap. I ended up sleeping for 4 hours! I woke up and my dad told me that my other uncle is not coming, therefore my baby cousin wont be there too! What a bummer... >.<

I think I wont be too happy to turn another year older, but I am excited to celebrate with my friends that I have not seen this whole summer.

Summer is going to end in a month and school will start soon. I hope that this school year will be good for me. I wonder if I would still want to apply for Johns Hopkins University, Brown, Yale and Stanford for next year. It seems like a dream.... just a dream if I could actually get in.

Anyway.... I'm missing Batman really bad. =(

-Andrea-

Another dream relay perhaps?

I woke at around 6:30 am today and I could remember snippets from my dream. Not as clearly as I could right when I woke up, but I could tell some parts.... In my dream I was at the airport here in Chicago and I was there to pick someone up. I was picking up Paul cause he came to visit me from Canada. From what I could remember, he was wearing the Batman shirt. What happened next... I am not sure anymore. I texted him right away about how I dreamt about him coming here and visiting me. In that same text message I said.. "Hey Batman!"

He just replied a couple of minutes ago and he said...

"That's so weird. I was wearing a Batman shirt when I fell asleep last night. 0_0"

Too much of a coincidence? I was thinking maybe... if you have heard of astral projection? It is an out of body experience where your soul wanders by itself either knowingly or without your consent. Maybe you did come here to Chicago last night and I met you at the airport. I wish my dream was longer... or that I could remember all of it. Wow. It would have been so fun and amazing if it was indeed astral projection.

-Andrea-

I used to love it when it rains. Now... I wish for it to go away. I am not sure why I feel like I am lacking something right now that is raining. It's just that I think I am longing for something I do not have or I cannot have but I am not sure what exactly that could be. The past couple of days was not dull or anything. Am I just dissatisfied with how my life is going right now? I have no reason to be dissatisfied. I have everything that I need but for one thing. That one thing should not make me feel as bad as this anyway.

I told him that the rain makes me feel sad for no reason... He said he likes the rain... What if opposites do not really attract. Could it have been the other way around?

The sun is shining now. I should feel better. =)

-Andrea-

Today was a little hectic. My mom was rushed to the hospital in the morning due to her lower abdomen complaints. The doctor said she has an acute appendicitis and it requires a surgery. She had the surgery and now her appendix is gone. Hopefully, my mother recovers fast from this. I pray that she gets well soon. As for now, I cannot do anything for her but to let her know that I am taking good care of my siblings specially my little brother. Tomorrow will be my first day at work and I am excited about it. It's another job at a coffee shop but so what? I am in dire need of money that I will do anything just to be able to help my parents.

Mama, I love you and get well soon! =)

-Andrea-

He said his mother likes me a lot... because she knows everything that I did for him. I am not sure what good things I have done, but I am thankful that she knows how I feel and what I'd do for her son.

I hope to meet you one day. Thank you for liking me. =)

-Andrea-

I am glad that just one smile and I could brighten up your day and lift up your mood. I really want you to be happy and as much as possible I want to be one of the reasons that can make your day. You know how much I'd give just to be there for you. I am always here. I was delighted to hear you call me babe again. It has been a while since the last time you called me that. Only last night did I really sleep well. I slept well because I made you happy, or at least better than how you were before you saw the video that I made. Anytime that you'd need someone, like what I said in the video, you can always count on me. <3

-Andrea-

Hello...

I finally got hired yesterday at Coffee Beanery and might get a second job at Pacsun. How lucky, eh? Although, when I heard from you that it has been really hard these past couple of weeks, I felt sorry. I want to help you in ways that I can. I am always here for you and you know that. I got your back! :)

I am sorry for my last entry... asking such things and not even knowing what you are going through right now. I feel bad. I hope things get better soon. Actually, I know they will. Hold on there. I know you are tough. Just hold on.

-Andrea-

I would never have the courage to tell you in person, on the phone, as a text message, or even on skype everything that I have in my mind right now, but I will write all of them here... why.. I like you and love you this much. I will make it sound like a story, though we all know that not all stories have a happy ending. Mine will end on a desperate note.

Hello there! Have you ever heard of the song "I wanna grow old with you"? 

I wanna make you smile 

Whenever you're sad 

Carry you around when your arthritis is bad 

All i wanna do, is grow old with you 

I'll get you medicine when your tummy aches 

Build you a fire if the furnace breaks 

So, it could be so nice growing old with you,.... 

I'll miss you 

Kiss you 

Give you my coat when you are cold 

Need you 

Feed you 

Even let you hold the remote control. 

So let me do the dishes in our kitchen sink 

Put you to bed when you've had too much to drink 

Oh I could be the man that grows old with you 

I wanna grow old with you.

This is my all time favourite song. =) Today,  I watched a really beautiful but heartbreaking movie. It was heartbreaking to me because I was jealous because it seems like the bond they had and the vow they made to each other will never apply to you and I. Do you know what are the reasons that justifies why I like you and love you? I will tell you all of them....

I like you because you are the only person that makes me happy yet also sad at the same time. I like you because you have the greatest barrier or wall that seems to be unbreakable... you are a challenge to me that I wouldn't me failing to conquer, but later on succumb to. I like you because you smile only when I make you, but it also makes me wonder if you smile because I forced you or if you smiled because of me. I like you because of the toughness you possess... it makes me feel safe. I like you because you want to stand on your own feet and make things your own way... it is admirable.  I like you because you are mysterious in ways only I could feel... I find it cool and sexy. i like you because I love you. I love you because I like you. I like you not only because of the unique traits that you have, but also physically. I like you because you have the most beautiful pair of eyes that I have seen in my entire life.... yes... your eyes seems cold when seen up-close, but I also dream to be the one to make them warm and thoughtful. I like you because you are the tallest man I have hugged ever so tightly in my whole life and that looking at your face would require me to stretch my neck up to a duck's neck length... and when we hugged before.. you just used one arm and you already grabbed my whole body... made me feel secure. I like you because you have that cute crooked nose I would always want to pinch. I like you because you have that kind of smirk that makes me think... about what it means and what it could have meant if I was wrong. I like you because you are not afraid to express your feelings when you are mad and when you think people have been unfair to you. I like you because I miss you and I can't let go.... no, I can't. I like you because you are not messy and everything is well kept...though keep in mind that nothing could ever be so straight. I like you because we share the same interests, though not all of them. I like you and love you because of the serene quietness you have.... though it seems so appalling that I am the complete opposite. I like you and I love you because we are opposites... opposites was said to attract each other: do I attract you? I like you because of all the good things and the flaws that you have... And I like you and love you because I would rather have the worst times with you than have the best ones with someone else...at least I will experience the good and the bad with you.. just you. 

One day, when I finally muster all the courage that I need, I will tell you all of these in person.

I was born six months before you. I had to wait in this world alone for you for six months. In the future, I will wait a long, long time. Stall all you like. Take all the time you want. I am not going anywhere...

-Andrea-